August 21, 2016 -
I remember when I started this blog many, many years ago it was called "Dear Sophie". It was my junior year of high school and I thought it would be a great idea to start a blog that was directed to my future daughter. That way, she had something to look back on and learn about me.
As the years went on, the blog name changed multiple times as well as why I had the blog. I was an angsty teenager, a confused high school graduate, and then a love struck newly wed. I have hidden all of my posts up until the love struck newly wed, mostly because the posts were full of secret messages to readers I thought I had who I thought secretly loved me. *insert eye roll here*
My first post was May 2010 and now, six years and a few months later, I sit here with a blueberry in my tummy that will grow into my first baby. It is so crazy to write it down. This is the first time, since finding out a month ago, that I have put it into words. I have told my family and Jake's family, but it still doesn't feel quite real. I haven't been too sick, although I do feel more like an old lady than ever because a 7:00 PM bedtime sounds wonderful and everything makes me cry. But let's be honest, I am always a few steps from tears and I've always gone to bed early so not much has changed.
We are in Idaho for my cousin Mary's wedding and the word was spread throughout my extended family as well. It is fun to see everyone's reactions and excitement and it definitely makes it feel more real. My uncle asked me and Jake if we had a secret preference. I told him that I am less scared to have a girl and I've always thought my first would be a girl (hence the blog at 17). Jake said he didn't have a preference, but later told me he thinks he would like a girl. Either way, I know that we are both eager for a healthy little human that is our own.
